


something we can't ignore

by bedfordanes



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Famous, Half-Sibling Incest, M/M, Underage Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-26
Updated: 2016-11-16
Packaged: 2018-02-10 13:47:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2027334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bedfordanes/pseuds/bedfordanes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis and Harry are half brothers and they're in love - even if they find it wrong</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Louis and Harry are close, actually they're closer than close. Eerily in sync with one another. They're half brothers, but to the eye they seem like actual brothers with their banter and their ease with one another.

One fault though. They were in love.

Their mothers - Anne and Jay - had moved to a secluded home together, because for them to have children from the same man was something the small town of Cheshire was seen as wrong and they would've been a mockery to their neighbors if they had stayed. So they packed up some clothes for themselves and moved to an even smaller town in Virginia in the woods where the closest neighborhood was five miles away. So naturally as Louis and Harry grew up, they only had themselves to play games with, playing hide and seek, follow the leader and with their toys every second of the day together. They were only two months apart from one another, Louis having been born two months before Harry.

Anne and Jay always feared that them being the only people in that so called "neighborhood" would make Harry and Louis come out a bit weird for they surely would've needed more than one friend, but they were proven wrong because at the age of three, as Louis and Harry went to preschool they would always be waiting with each others for their mums to pick them up, holding hands or kicking their feet in sync. By the time they were in the fifth grade the two young boys who were growing more handsome as each day passed would go to school together, walk home together, and do their homework together. They didn't bother making friends because everyone always laughed at how they said words differently like "mum" instead of "mom", or "football" instead of "soccer".

It wasn't until the age of fourteen that Anne and Jay decided it was time to head back to the UK. They figured if they had decided to move back to their neighborhood in Cheshire that no one would remember them or they wouldn't question how their two boys were so close to age. Unfortunately Harry and Louis were upset when they found out that they were to separated, because after a week of deciding, Jay wanted to move back to her hometown of Doncaster while Anne wanted to stay in Cheshire. So they saved money while Louis and Harry spent more time together outside in the woods, saying they didn't need their mothers even though they always ended up in their own beds by nightfall.

By age sixteen, Louis and Harry noticed how attracted they were to one another, no matter how wrong they knew it was. They had secret kisses in the woods together whenever one felt distresses with all the planning their mothers were doing to move back to the UK. Then their soft innocent kisses turned hungrier, more frantic and more desperate to hold onto what they only really had since the beginning - each other. They never talked about what they were doing, just shared kisses in secret in the woods, only to never mention it when they were in each others room. Neither dared to try to kiss the other in either of their mum's house, or even in the secrecy of their bedrooms. The most they did at home were the lingering hand grazes when they passed each other on the stairs.

Harry was really into yoga while Louis was into football. Louis would spend Sundays out in the woods running around with a football at his feet, kicking it around while Harry would be near him, stretching and doing his yoga poses. Whenever they looked and shared eye contact they would feel the primal need to touch, to mark, to kiss one another. Louis would see Harry's flexibility and Harry would see Louis' muscularity. They tried their best to ignore it, tried hard to look away and will their impure thoughts away, but as the days closed in before their move they found it impossible to stop their thoughts of wanting to spend one night together in the most closest way any human could be.

\- : -

They were stargazing. Outside alone side by side looking at the stars with the clouds forming around and pointing out what stars they knew.

"Look! That's the big dipper I believe." Louis whispered because the night seemed cozy, and he felt as if he would've spoken in a louder more booming voice then whatever spell he and Harry were under would be broken.

"Yeah." Harry whispered back, his pinky finger grazing Louis'. Harry swallowed hard, feeling his stomach churn.

They laid in silence before Louis turned his head to stare at Harry's profile. He was truly something to look at, Louis thought. Louis always thought Harry was unbelievably attractive. With his chestnut curls and wide green eyes, he was the most gorgeous person Louis has ever laid his eyes on.

Turning to meet Louis' gaze Harry curled his pinky around Louis'. The starts were making Louis' blue eyes catch the colors of the night, reflecting a kaleidoscopic pattern. "You're the most beautiful person I have ever met." Harry whispered in a husky voice, "I can see stars in your eyes." His voice cracked.

"No Harry, that's you. You're so beautiful with your quirky jokes and clumsy ways, I don't know what I'm going to do when we're away from each other." Louis' voice seemed to not be able to go above Harry's. "Living here with you and your mum has made me a bit codependent with you. I wake up and can easily feel the need to go to you, to hear your voice and the need to make you smile or laugh. You're laugh is so amazing I always want to see you laugh, H."

Harry made a hurt sound, the noise catching in his throat as he surged forward to kiss Louis. His hands tangled in Louis' hair with was clumsily cut, a result of Harry trying to cut his hair when they're hair was growing a bit too long, on a rainy day four months ago. Louis' hands caught onto Harry's hips squeezing tightly as he responded to Harry's eager kiss.

Harry felt on fire. All his life he tried to deny his feelings for his half brother, but he wanted him. He gasped with the shame of admitting it, which gave Louis the chance to hesitantly touch their tongues together. As if under a spell, Harry rolled his hips, feeling Louis' manhood press against his bum, making him push against it, wanting all that Louis was willing to give.

"Take me, take me right here before we never get the chance to when we're hundreds of miles away from each other." Harry gasped, arching his neck as a silent plea for Louis to mark him, to claim him as his before anyone else had the chance to.

"We shouldn't do it, H. It's morally wrong, what would our mums think?" Louis protested weakly, even as he nipped and sucked little red blossoms onto Harry's pale skin.

"Please, Lou.", came Harry's desperate plea, "I love you, more than I know how to handle most days, I don't care about wrong or right, all I care about is how much I love you and how much you mean to me." Harry rambled, tugging Louis' shirt above his head, then dropping his hands to start unbuckling Louis' belt.

Louis' words died in his throat as he gave into everything he tried so hard to keep in a box locked away in the back of his brain. What Harry said made his heart want to burst.

They rolled around on the dirt, tugging off each other's clothes. Louis had no prep for Harry, but he had watched enough porn to have a sense of what to do. Pulling Harry's cheeks apart, he blew air lightly onto Harry's pink puckered hole, watching it flutter around nothing in fascination. It was like all of his wet dreams were coming true, making him feel overwhelmed. Trying to calm himself, Louis nibbled on Harry's fleshy pale thighs, trying to regulate his breathing. After a minute he leaned down, boldly licking a fat stripe around Harry's hole, making Harry gasped and clutch onto his hair.

"Oh God." Harry moaned.

Feeling more confident, Louis gave little kitten licks to Harry's hole, then used his thumbs to spread Harry a bit wider, licking messily. Harry was writhing above him, gasping and letting out these pretty noises. After a particular lick where Louis let his teeth graze Harry's perineum and Harry gave a shout, Louis let go of one of his thighs, sticking three fingers into Harry's mouth, softly whispering, "suck" onto Harry's cheek. Harry was quick to oblige, sucking on Louis' finger and rolling his tongue around their circumference. After a few seconds, Louis extracted his fingers, gently pushing a fraction of his middle finger into Harry, making him shiver.

"Please please please Oh God please Louis." Harry moaned softly, pushing back against his finger.

Louis pushed his finger in further, slowly, waiting for Harry to adjust to it a bit before pumping his finger, and not long after he added a second finger, then a third. Feeling desperate, Louis tugged off his boxers, letting his dick slap against his navel. He aligned his body with Harry, nudging the knob of his prick against Harry's fluttering hole.

Pushing in, Louis squeezed his eyes tightly. None of his dreams or fantasies could ever amount to the actual thing. Harry felt like a vice around his prick, squeezing tight around him that Louis could feel himself pulsing, making him afraid that he'd bust too soon and embarrass himself. At Harry's soft nod, where he wrapped his hands around Louis' neck, Louis started extracting his prick a bit from Harry's hole, only to push back in quickly when only his tip was left inside. Harry gasped by his ear, tightening his arms and legs around Louis.

Louis pumps in and out of Harry, steadily picking up a rhythm. He nuzzled his neck into Harry's sweaty neck, resting his forearms by each side of Harry's head. "God, H, I love you so much." 

"Love you too, Lou. Always have."

And with those words Harry came, tightening around Louis so good that he was only able to thrust three more times before he felt himself coming too, filling Harry with warmth. After their blissful orgasms started to subside, they broke apart from their embrace, staring at one another wide eyed. What they did was wrong, they both knew it.

They got up to change, looking at anywhere but one another. They didn't have to say sorry, the slow way they dressed up spoke it in volumes. They went to the nearby lake, hugging each other, they weren't exactly the most religious people in the world, but Anne and Jay did bring them up with the bible as a guide for them to know what was right and wrong, and while they had felt no shame in not being straight - either of them - they did feel the shame of being in love with a blood relation.

"It was only one time, God will forgive us surely. I mean - He forgives everyone, right? And we can make sure we never do this again. I'll castrate myself before I let this happen again." Louis stammered.

Harry just held onto him that much tighter.

"I love you, Louis Tomlinson, and there is nothing for Him to forgive, for that was an act of love. When we move, our feelings will fade, and they'll be nothing but memories of sweet yesterdays. Yes, we'll never do this again, after all we are half brothers." Harry whispered, knowing that in his half brother he had found his taste of what true love is like.

\- : -

At age nineteen Harry was enrolled into med school, having the brains to skip a year of school and was on his way to be a doctor. Louis was in college as well, but for acting. He had a job at a theatre where he did a few live performances as Peter Pan.

Anne and Jay kept in contact even though they lived quite far away from each other. They shared stories of how proud they were of their boys, and their love lives. Anne met a man named Derek, who was apparently a sweet heart and Jay was engaged to a man named Brian.

Louis was dating a man named Christopher, while Harry slept with his share of men and women. They were both "happy" as they could be, still fighting their way to ignore how they felt. They felt the aching to be so far apart, and when drove to see each other it was always so easy to forget to ignore their feelings, when they were so close, yet still yearning for what they couldn't have.

Harry was in Donny, visiting Jay and Louis when he and Louis went out to the cinema. They had just finished watching a French movie which neither paid much attention to, too focused on the energy between them. "So, how are you, Lou?" Harry asked softly as they stepped into Louis' apartment.

"I'm good, had a few performances this week, but how are you, Bookworm?" Louis teased lightly, making Harry blush.

"Good, studying so hard that I don't have enough time to think about you or what you're up to."

"Harry...."

"No, Louis. Don't. I miss you. I want to come home to you everyday, I want to hold your hand right now and I want to know what you're doing with a dick like Chris. It's hard for me to ignore how I feel about you when you're all I think, all I dream." Harry snapped.

"It's - it's not easy for me either okay?! But I want someone who'll make me feel good about myself. I want someone who won't make me feel like I'm unholy when I crawl into bed at night!"

Louis knew Harry was going to bring it up one day, was going to try to persuade him to fall into his bed again. Was going to remind him of what he didn't want to be reminded of.

"We can do it, Louis. We can - we can move away to somewhere no one knows us, live together and be happy. I - it doesn't need to even be a sexual relationship, I just want - I want you close to me, where I can see you, hear your voice, wake up to your face, touch you, and know what you're doing."

"Listen to what you're saying Harry!," Louis turned to Harry, bullet fast, "You're saying we could just live platonically together, every day and not do what we promised we wouldn't? It's wrong! Plus, it's not like you'd give up becoming a doctor anyway! So where do you think you're going with you're whole daydream?"

"You know i couldn't give a damn about being a doctor if that meant I'd get to have you!" Harry raged.

"I love Christopher! Don't you get that, Harry? We're in love and I'm not letting you ruin that."

Harry seized Louis by his shoulders, shaking him, making Louis' eyes momentarily roll into the back of his skull. "You say you love him but it's me you love! Don't deny it! I know you better than I know myself! Your blood gets hot when mine does, your heart beats fast when mine does." Harry yelled, grabbing Louis by the back of his neck, kissing his fiercely. "I love you! Oh how I love you! You haunt my dreams, my thoughts! Day in and day out, it's you! You who I can never have!"

Louis pushed at Harry's shoulders, making him release Louis. 

"Oh don't act like such a victim! You act like you've been celibate all these years! Do you say that to all the people you've slept with? Harry, we aren't meant to be together! It's unholy. So go find someone else to love, for I'm not going to reciprocate your love! So get out! Get out of my apartment!"

Harry looked at him, eyes blazing. "Fine! God, I'm such a fool aren't I? For putting my love and trust on you, when you're just like our father! Getting what you want then moving onto something else! But I'd let you have whomever you wanted, as long as it was me you came back too! I'm foolish enough to want to be back in those woods, where it was only you and I! Where no else wanted us but each other!"

"You don't mean that."

"God forgive me but I do!"

"You need to leave, H." Louis squeezed him eyes tightly, fists clenched, The door slammed.

\- : -

Louis was moving to New York.

He and Christopher were offered to be in a larger acting company, and they jumped for the opportunity.

Jay was proud, crying as Louis packed. She kept gushing about how proud of him she was, and how he better not forget about her. Louis knew he would never forget the people in his old life who were there but something told him that maybe he should, or maybe forget one person in particular.

Harry knew he was moving, of course he knew. Louis didn't tell him, didn't plan to, but when Jay first found out the news, she rung Anne and Anne had her on speaker, and Harry so happened to be home that weekend. Louis' been ignoring the texts and calls from Harry ever since. He had a feeling Harry wouldn't give up that easily though.

As predicted, the day when Louis was leaving, Harry was waiting for him at the airport. His eyes had bags underneath and his hair was messy. Louis felt a tug at his heart, so he clutched tighter to his boyfriend's hand.

"So you were just going to up and leave then?" Harry questioned when he was in hearing distance.

"That was ultimately the plan but..."

"Well I couldn't let my brother leave without saying goodbye."

"Well then. Goodbye, H." Louis smiled tightly. 

"No hug?" Harry smirked, opening his arms. Louis gritted his teeth but hugged Harry, knowing if he didn't that Chris would question it. But when Harry wrapped his arms around Louis, he unexpectedly lifted Louis as if he weighed nothing and spun him around.

"Look at my bro! Off to become the world's best actor! Next thing you know I'll be seeing you in movies!" He lowered Louis, lips going to kiss Louis' but Louis leaned the other way, making Harry's lips catch his cheek. Harry pulled back, smile bright.

"Well we'll be off." Louis smiled tightly, grabbing Christopher's hand as their flight number was called. Chris and Harry shook hands as a departure, but Harry was obviously tense. Louis tugged at Chris' hand. "See ya around, H!" Louis called back, speed walking to the place they were meant to go.

He looked back for a split second to see Harry looking solemnly at where Louis' hand was interlocked with Christopher's, making Louis feel oddly guilty. When will my past set me free, Louis wondered. He hoped New York offered him plenty to forget how he felt about Harry.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flash forward four years, Harry is graduating and Louis is a ball of memories.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry! I totally forgot that I started this until I went through my files and found this hidden gem. I'm like two years too late, and it's midnight and I doubt anyone is even going to read this but hey, at least I'm finishing what I started. If someone by any chance does read this, let me know if I should continue or discontinue this once and for all. Anyways, I hope you all enjoy this chapter, reading it certainly had myself taken aback. But I'll leave whoever happens to come across this to it. If there are any errors please beware, because I did not really pay attention to grammar or punctuation and I did not word check this so yeah. Fight me, I don't care.

__

_"Here it is. The day I've been waiting for, and I know you have as well. I'm graduating from med school and am embarrassed to tell you that I am also Valedictorian of my class of 430 students. I will not accept my MD if you aren't there, and you can let your dearest Christopher know how much this means to me, to **us** , for me to be getting my MD. I look forward to seeing you in the crowd cheering and showcasing your admiration for me, as I will bask in the glow of your admiration. Yours always, Harry."_

Tears welled up in Louis' eyes as he eyed the vanilla envelope that contained the invitation to Harry's graduation, along with the personal letter Harry had included for Louis. Pride swelled in his chest, causing his heart to hammer profusely. It's been four years since Harry starting his enrollment in med school, and Louis knew he even had an internship at a local hospital while simultaneously finishing his last year. That's just how smart he was.

Louis was in one of the most prestigious companies for theatrics. It was large enough where he had enough papers written about him whenever he starred in a play, or was offered a role in a movie or show. He was paid well enough, as was his spouse, Christopher. _Ah, Christopher,_ Louis thought. That was going to be a pain in the ass, getting Chris to agree to go to Harry's graduation. Sometime along the four years they've lived together, Chris had taken a disliking to Harry. It was when Harry came to visit around Christmas time two years ago.

∴∵∴ ୨୧ ∴∵∴

_Louis was waving his arms frantically, waiting for Harry's tall frame to board off the plane. He knew that Harry wouldn't be able to see him just yet but Louis was just so excited to begin showing Harry around New York. Christopher and Louis waited patiently for twenty minutes before Chris noticed Harry._

_"There he is!", Chris shouted over the buzz of talkative people surrounding them, pointing at the tall and scrawny figure._

_"Harry!" Louis bellowed. Part to be heard over everyone scattering along, and part because he hasn't seen Harry in what has felt like too long._

_Harry's formed took a light jog to the two guys waiting for him. His light jog sped up the closer he got to Louis. Harry felt like his lungs were finally able to breathe again as he picked Louis up and spun with him, both men laughing joyously. They slowly came to a stop, not yet ready to leave one another's embrace and their eyes speaking volumes of the love they tried to deny. It wasn't until a partially awkward sound of a throat clearing that they managed to break eye contact. Looking over they both seemed to remember that there was in fact a third party still with them._

_"How was the flight, Haz?" Louis asked, softly brushing a few tendrils of hair away from Harry's face. No longer was he the cherub of a boy Louis dreamed about at times. No, this was a grown man standing before him, his muscles were more defined, nose sharper than before, eyes so clear and bright it seemed that he held the sun in his irises. Oh how much the lad before him has grown. And into such a beautiful creature, too. It almost hurt to stare at him, forbidden memories rearing their heads for Louis to face what he gave up._

_"Long, and tiring. There was a pregnant woman next to me cooing to her stomach for more than half of the flight. Highlight of the flight, to be perfectly honest." Harry stated. He then turned his gaze to the man with them, eyes losing some of the light they held for Louis. "Hey, Chris. Been well, mate?" Harry asked, holding his hand out for a shake. He didn't like the guy one bit, but he didn't want to possibly upset Louis by acting rude to his boyfriend, no matter how much he wanted Louis for himself._

_After about twenty minutes of chattering, mostly between Harry and Louis, the trio decided it'd be best to head to the couple's condo, seeing as all of their nose's staring to run and their lips were turning blue. Since Harry was jet lagged he spent the remainder of that afternoon napping, while Louis hustled and bustled to make dinner for him to eat, and planned for day after. Chris was on the sofa, watching a rerun of a shitty show he seemed to enjoy for a reason Louis could never understand. Dinner was spent with Louis on foot for Harry's every command and Harry constantly stealing touches, unable to stop himself, from having Louis so close. They chattered throughout dinner about the every topic they could think of to cover, catching up and speaking with so much affection in their tones that even an outsider could tell their feelings._

∴∵∴ ୨୧ ∴∵∴

_A few days later, Harry and Louis were walking around near where Louis' agency was located. They were talking about Louis' participation in an upcoming play, a rendition of Shakespeare's Hamlet. Their gazes never straying too far from one another's eyes, which spoke volumes about a subject neither dared to yet bring up._

_"And in through that window is the practice room where I spend several hours of my day making sure I'm just perfect for whichever role I get. Sometimes all of us go on dates, but when we do, we always make sure to go together." Louis finished._

_"I'm sure you and Chris would've loved to go on dates alone though." Harry spoke, not daring to look into Louis' eyes._

_"Well, I'm sure you've went on plenty of dates, H. But I never hear of them." Louis said, wanting to change the topic before too late._

_"Would you like to hear of them?" A frown was etched into the edges of plump lips._

_"Yes. I would like to hear which girl or boy has stolen my brother's heart. It would give me solace to know my brother has someone in his heart." Blue eyes met green, clashing as their chests unknowingly tightened._

_"I do have someone in my heart." Harry grasped Louis' hand, continuing their walk, hands swaying between them. "It's someone I've known my whole life. I wake up to ache all over, as he aches all over. I dream of him on stage, just beyond my reach. I also dream of a certain night in the woods where the moon seemed to watch us as it is now, and condemning us for feeling too much. He haunts my every waking thought, making all those I date seem dull in comparison. And when our gazes meet, their blood pulses hard and fast as mine does."_

_"I don't belong there, Harry. Let in the first person who knocks at your heart in." Louis said desperately, willing his heart to slow down._

_"I did exactly as you've said, Louis. The first one who knocked was let in, and now I can't very well drive them out. But that's my problem to deal with, not yours." Harry said, his hand squeezing Louis'._

_"Please, Harry. Forget me." Unshed tears started gathering at the corner of Louis' eyes._

_"Oh, Louis. How can I forget you when you're all I know." Harry said softly, bring Louis into his embrace. "Darling, you've got my pinned to the wall and labeled as yours until the day I die. And if you die first, it wouldn't be long before I follow." How casually he said those words, bringing a chill of pleasure and fear through Louis' body. Soft, ruby red lips leaned down to press on thin, pink lips. Cautiously treading on thin ice and neither daring to deepen the kiss, in fear of breaking the spell they were under._

∴∵∴ ୨୧ ∴∵∴

_Back at home, Chris was angrily waiting for them. Once the duo came through the door, he was on Louis' and asking Harry if he could let them have a chat alone. Harry, after being given a nod from Louis, left to the guest room he was occupying for the next two days._

_"Have fun today, darling?" Chris snarled, tone mocking._

_"What do you mean? What's wrong with you?" Louis asked. Never did he hear this tone of voice from Chris, not even in the heat of an argument._

_"Nothing's wrong with me, there's something wrong with you. For the past week and a half I've been practically non-existent to you. You haven't touched me, haven't kissed me, haven't said you loved me. Why, it seems as if your darling brother is the reason for this change in you. I have eyes. I'm not blind." Chris spat, waving his finger at Louis, as if daring him to say he is blind._

_"Blind? What the hell are you going on about, love?"_

_"You're not acting like yourself, you leave me alone at home to go out with your brother, follow his every indulgence, and you completely shut me out. Harry this, Harry that. I'm tired of it. I'm even crazy enough to think that there's three people in this relationship, for I've never seen siblings so fascinated with one another." Fury clouded Christopher's eyes._

_"Do you have to do this now, Chris?" Louis looked nervously towards the door of the guest room. Chris has never been violent, but with his tone Louis didn't know what to expect, but he sure as hell didn't want Harry witnessing this. Any of it. "Let's talk tomorrow after my brother leaves. Please, Chris."_

_"Fuck this, I need a drink." Chris said, turning towards the door of their, slinging on his jacket he shot Louis one last look of anger before slamming the door. Louis let out a shaky breath, hoping Harry would stay in his room for the night. Too much happened for Louis to process, and he didn't trust himself to make a smart decision. Turning to the room he and Chris shared, Louis padded over there slowly, pausing outside the guest room for just a millisecond, temptation filling his veins, before he continued to his room and proceeded to sleep._

∴∵∴ ୨୧ ∴∵∴

After that visit, Christopher acted as if Harry was a rival. He would listen in on their phone calls, make Louis cancel plans to fly out to see one another, and would stay glued to Louis' side at all times. Not to mention, Chris took it upon himself to be like Louis' manager, and booked him for countless schedules, just to keep him busy, so that would mean less time for him to try to sneak a call to Harry. He allowed him to call Jay, but whenever Harry was mentioned, Chris' jaw would lock and he'd shut the topic down immediately.

_What a mighty task this was going to be,_ Louis thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How was it? Did you all enjoy? I sure hope you did. Feel free to leave any constructive criticism below. Try not to criticize me too much though, for I am not a professional writer and this was written like two years ago in preparation to update this. And I'm honestly shocked I still remembered my password to here. Anyways, toodles!


	3. Chapter 3

Louis was in trouble. He knew it once he stepped foot out of the door of their home. And Louis' subconscious was constantly nagging at him for not feeling an ounce of guilt for being so happy to be alone, away from Chris. He had asked Chris to join him in going to Harry's graduation but, as Louis predicted, he wanted to be nowhere near said man. He can still feel the rage and sadness over his argument with Chris. He wasn't even sure if they were still together, with the way things were going before he just decided to pack his bags and go.

∴∵∴ ୨୧ ∴∵∴

"Chris, we'll just be there for three days, tops!" Louis tried to reason, hands slowly massaging Chris' shoulders.

"I want to hear none of it, Louis. We're together, it's only right that we can spend a week getaway to reconcile with one another before work bombards us." Chris said, turning around slowly, hands raising to fit themselves over Louis' hips. "I've missed your touch, we've both been so busy to enjoy time together. This would be our chance, baby."

Oh how Louis glowed. He missed having those hands upon his body, playing him as if he were Chris' favorite instrument. They've been together for so long, that they both knew each other's body as if we're their own. And maybe to a certain extent, it was.

"I know, love, but you know it's only one time which Harry will graduate. We can just stay there for a day or three and then spend the remainder of our time together. If we plan this right, we'll have enough time to do both, I swear." Louis wanted to spend time with Chris, but Louis also wanted to see Harry walk across that stage.

Fury rose in Chris' eyes, and with nostrils slowly starting to flare, he stood up. "Babe, Louis, please just listen to me, Harry will have your mom, and his, at his graduation. There is no need for him to have us there. He'll understand that we need this time together."

"No, _I'm_ going. If you want to join me, please do. But if not, then I am not going to beg you to do so. I would love to have you there, but with you being so rude as to not show your support for my brother, it'd be best if you stood." Louis ranted, stopping to take a breath. "And it's not fair, Harry came to a few of your performances to show his support, so why can't you? You know how much this means to him, _to me_."

"If you want to leave, then go! But just know, that I won't be waiting idly by for your return."

"Is that a threat? My god, you really have some balls to act as if I'd drop everything to make sure you stay here. I'll leave, and if you want to go do whatever it is you plan on doing without me here, then don't let me stop you. You're being such an arse for no reason. We could've done both things without it affecting our jobs." Louis said, stomping off to furiously pack his bags as quickly as his arms would allow him to.

Hearing the slam of the front door, Louis sighed. Maybe this was best, he thought. He didn't know why he had wanted Chris to go with him so badly, he knew how Chris and Harry felt about one another, but he so hoped that with enough time they would be able to get along. Shaking his head, he began zipping his luggage and started to pack his toiletries. After a few more minutes, he was out the house, breathing in the cold evening air, before hailing a cab to take him to the airport.

∴∵∴ ୨୧ ∴∵∴

Harry was pacing back and forth at the airport, waiting for Louis' plane to land. He didn't actually believe that Louis would make it. Harry had figured that Louis would come up with a flimsy excuse to not show up. When Jay phoned him, asking him if he can go get Louis from the airport, along with the predicted time he should land, Harry jumped at the opportunity. He missed Louis. It's been two years since he's seen Louis, and if hadn't seen the pictures Jay loved to showed of Louis, then Harry might've just forgotten how he looked.

_Yeah, right_ , Harry internally scoffed, _as if I could ever forget anything about Louis._

Louis was all there was for Harry, he knew that. Ever since that time in the woods, he just knew it. It was like a flashing sign behind his eyes telling him that Louis was the one, _the only one_ , for him. Harry couldn't remember a time where he felt right with anyone else besides Louis. Never did he feel at home just by looking at someone like he does with Louis. Never did he feel his blood sing when their fingers touched. And never did he crave someone so much to the point where his every thought, and every dreamed was filled with visions of them. Only with Louis, and Harry believed that's how it would always be.

If Harry was honest with himself, he did waver from time to time. He knew he loved Louis with ever fiber of his existence, but he was still a man and wanted to be touched. Harry would always feel like shit after every time he went back to his one bedroom apartment and it was someone else besides Louis whom he allowed to touch him. He was weak and lost without Louis. Constantly trying to find a replacement, even for a short time, to make him feel every bit of affection he so craved from Louis but was denied.

Harry doesn't know how long he had been lost in thought, but next he knew, he heard bustling about him, and names being shouted left and right. The noise had never stopped so Harry wondered why it was then that he was snapped out of his trail of thought, but then, as if they knew what he was searching for, his eyes stopped at a spot ahead and a bit to the left of him, and his heart stopped for a split second before thudding with such ferocity he thought he was about to suffer a heart attack. And maybe he was, because right before his eyes was the subject of his thoughts, in the flesh and blood. Blinking a few times, Harry briefly wondered if time had stopped as Louis and he stood frozen, gazes locked in a silent showdown to see who would break contact first. Louis' breath was ragged, his hot breath creating smoke as it met the cold air around him, and his heart was picking up in speed.

Both men slowly started walking towards one another, and before either minds could process what what going on, they were just mere inches apart, hands going to wrap around one another at the same time as if they shared the same thought of wanting to hold the other. As if in a dream they both drifted off into an alternate reality, one that allowed them to escape the forbiddenness of their relationship. That allowed them for a few moments to forget who they were. But as always, reality beckoned for them to break their contact in the form of someone accidentally knocking over Louis' luggage, barely sparing a backwards glance to just say a quick sorry before continuing to wherever they were rushing to.

"I've missed you." Harry breathed softly, he didn't dare to say much else in fear that his voice would crack from the overflowing sense of love that seemed to be threatening to cause him to explode. 

"I've missed you too, Harry." Louis was no better than Harry, he felt lightheaded just from being near him. Slowly, he backed away, flashing a smile to Harry, and bent down to pick up his forgotten, fallen luggage. Louis expected for Harry to be the one to pick him up even if he had not called him.

The two started walking in the direction of the parking lot, Harry talking the burden of luggage off of Louis with one hand and gripping Louis' hand in his other. He felt whole with Louis by his side, but it wasn't long before they reached Harry's car and Harry let Louis to get into the car which was still warm from being heated earlier while Harry hurried to put Louis' luggage in the trunk and then jumped into the driver seat. The car was already started, Louis having grabbed the keys from Harry's hand when Harry took his luggage, to warm up the engine from the coldness outside. After about five minutes, they set off to go to Jay's home, where Louis would be staying while he visited.

∴∵∴ ୨୧ ∴∵∴

Today was the day.

Louis, Anne, and Jay were buzzing with pride for Harry, whom they haven't seen all day because he had to leave early to pick up his cap and gown, and to go to the location which his graduation would be taking place. They were all restless, none able to sit for longer than a minute before they were up and at it again; arranging and adjusting things that had already been taken care of. Time to start heading to Harry's graduation couldn't seem to hurry for them.

Finally three in the afternoon struck and they all eagerly raced into Anne's car, which they decided they'd all take together so they wouldn't have to worry about someone losing a parking spot or being delayed. Never was there a more animated car ride, endless chatter and constant praises for the respective man of the day filled the air of the car for the whole half an hour drive it took for the trio to arrive at the plantation where the ceremony was being held. Once they had parked and were seated, Louis couldn't seem to stop fidgeting. Parents and loved ones of all the graduates were seated, taking pictures, or chatting with the ones next to them. Anne and Jay were both smiling, chatting, and beaming with pride for the man they both held dear to their heart; meanwhile, Louis felt the need to vomit, he felt nervous as if he were the one to walk across stage.

"Attention, attention. We will now begin the graduation ceremony for this year's University of Cambridge graduating class....." A soft, warm voice started speaking and slowly the auditorium grew silent and voices hushed to allow the woman to speak with no interruptions.

Harry was buzzing with barely contained joy. He was ready to give his Valedictorian speech, to throw his cap in the air, to receive his cover for his diploma (he still had to return to school a few days later to pick up his actual diploma), but most of all he was ready to be with Louis, Jay, and his mother for the remainder of the day. Today was to surely be the happiest day of his existence. Surrounded by the people he loved most, and to finally achieve his life long dream. He had no errands to run at his internship today, either. All was well for his world. Backstage seemed to pass as a blur because next thing Harry knew, his peers were all shuffling in the rows they were assigned, and slowly they started walking the passage towards the auditorium.

Everyone in the plantation stood as the graduates walked into the room. Cameras flashed as everyone took pictures and recorded their descent down the stairs into their seats. Louis could see Harry's eye wander around the room, and his suspicions were confirmed when their gazes locked that it was he whom Harry's eyes searched for as Harry beamed what had to be the largest smile to ever exist. White pearls nearly blinded Louis more than all the flashes that were going on around the room. Heart racing, Louis smiled back even as he felt his eyes start to prickle with unshed tears of pride. Anne and Jay were both squealing as their fingers rapidly pressed on their phones to take pictures of Harry in his gown and cap. Soon enough it was time for Harry to make his speech, and next thing he knew he was standing at the podium, hands shaking slightly as he cleared his throat to gain everyone's attention.

"Welcome, dear parents, family, and loved ones of this year's graduating class, here at the University of Cambridge School of Clinical Medicine. It is my honor to speak to you all as Valedictorian of my peers, it's been a wonderful journey to have experienced with all of you....." Harry spoke, voice never trailing off from his speech that he could probably recite in his sleep from how much he practiced. His eyes trailed off though, into the electric blue eyes of Louis. Neither were sure how their eyes were able to find one another in the mass of bodies surrounding them, but as they both beamed at one another, they couldn't be bothered to hide their feelings. The unshed tears in Louis' eyes, as Harry's eyes shone with all the love he never bothered to deny for Louis.

Sadly though, Louis wondered, _just what was it about him that allowed Harry to never forget about him?_

∴∵∴ ୨୧ ∴∵∴

By the time the graduation ceremony ended, in a flurry of glistening eyes, flashing cameras, thrown caps, and turned tassels, it was nearly seven in the evening by the time the family were leaving the plantation. They were going to eat out for dinner, a celebratory dinner for Harry's success. Harry was in the backseat of the car, alongside Louis. If the situation had been different, maybe Harry would've dared to scoot closer, but his mother kept turning around and sobbing at the fact that "her beautiful baby boy achieved his life long dream". Even without his mother constantly turning around, Harry couldn't seem to brave himself enough to touch Louis' pinky with his own. Every hair on Harry's arm seemed to stand just by being in close proximity with the man of his dreams in such an enclosed space. Harry wasn't sure how much longer he could sit there acting nonchalant without doing something drastic. Louis was no better. Although Louis didn't dare look to his left, much to Harry's disappointment, it was as if Louis' body was keenly aware of Harry's sitting no less that three inches away from him. Even with his gaze on the bypassing streets and pedestrians, he was able to see Harry's reflection on the mirror with such acuity, he may as well have been staring at him. 

Taking a deep breath, Harry instantly regretted it. Breathing in Louis' manly fragrance was doing things to his body that was inappropriate considering his own mother was sitting just in front of said man. Nipples hardening, Harry inwardly cursed.

_Now is not the time,_ he subconsciously scolded himself, _you're not a teenage boy, control yourself, Harry._

In Louis' peripheral vision, he could see Harry with his eyes shut, sitting on his hands. Turning his head slightly, he couldn't help himself in soaking in the vision of Harry as the ivory skin of his cheeks took on a rosy color. His gaze lowered onto Harry's torso, where it was rising up and down at a fast pace, as if he had run a mile. Louis could practically feel his mouth salivating at the great beauty that was presented before his eyes; Louis couldn't help but briefly think that his eyes were deceiving him.

"Shit." Came the low mumble from Harry's plump lips.

"You okay, love?" Anne asked, while turning her head in her son's direction.

"Yeah, fine, Mum. Just feeling.... Um.... Just feeling a bit, nervous I guess. For what life will hold for me now that it sunk in that I'm no longer in Med School." The lie came flying out of Harry's mind as he opened his eyes, not daring to look at the concerned eyes of Louis, only at the eyes of his mum's. Harry can just imagine how he looked with his flushed cheeks, but he thanked his lucky stars that his dress up shirt and blazer covered his nipples, which were still hard. Harry's lips suddenly felt extremely dried, so swiping his tongues across them, he wondered if his pupils were dilated. Shaking out his curls, while his heart beat in an incongruous rhythm, Harry tried to mentally cool himself down.

They finally arrived at the restaurant they would be dining at, and Harry welcomed the cool air. As they walked in, Louis was glad that the place was not crowded, he didn't need to be so close to Harry again in such a short period of time. As they all seated themselves, the two ladies sat next to each other and the two men sat themselves in front of their respective mother. No less than a minute later, a young woman came to ask if they'd like any refreshments, to which they all have their order of what they'd like to drink.

"I'll be back in a minute with your drinks, and to take your orders." The woman was gone before anyone can utter a 'thank you'.

Silence followed as all four looked over their menus, which had already been placed when they were seated, eyes scanning through the words to see which dish would spike an interest to their stomachs. As they all decided, the waitress, whose name tag read 'Penelope', came back to quickly jot down their orders before scurrying along to take the notepad to the cooks with a promise of their food to come out shortly. The quartet continued their previous conversation in the car and bombarded Harry with questions about his internship, and Louis about his upcoming play. As their food came out, they all happily fed their ravenous stomachs. None having eaten all day, they all finished within a matter of ten minutes. Record time, really. They all soon waited for their dessert to come out.

Palming the box in his slack's pocket, Louis pulled it out. Clearing his throat, he awkwardly stated, "Here you go, Harry. A present for you graduating. It's not much now, but when I saw it, I just knew I had to get it for you." Placing the jewelry box in Harry's open palm, Louis licked his lips, which seemed to have dried out during his introduction of his present.

Upon opening the dark blue box, Harry's throat caught. Lying on a bed of soft silk matching the exterior of the box, there was a small gold pendant with an even smaller iridescent green gem wedged in the middle of the pendant. Cautiously lifting the pendant, the chain that therefore followed had chills erupt along Harry's spine from the coolness of the object. Or so he told himself. Harry was silent, and his vision blurred from the wetness that gathered at his tear duct; threatening to fall if Harry dared to blink.

"Thank you so much, Louis. You really didn't have to, but thank you. I'll cherish this till the end of my days." Came out Harry's gratitude in the form of a husky voice due to his emotions for the necklace and for the man who thought to give him it.

"It's not that big of a deal. Not the most extravagant necklace, but the small green gem just had me thinking of you. It matches your eyes, does it not?" Louis said, briefly directing his eyes away from Harry to Jay and Anne at the question he asked, and both women nodded, their eyes tearing up at the fact that their sons thought so dearly of one another. As Louis went to speak again, his phone suddenly started vibrating. Looking at the caller ID, he excused himself.

Walking outside into the reception area, he swiped his finger to accept the call. "Yes?"

"Louis..... Louis....." A deep inhaling breath could be heard over the line, "I think we should break up. And now before you interrupt-" came Chris' hurried response as if he knew that Louis already had his mouth open to object the idea, "-I'm serious. I'm not drunk by any means. But I was just thinking. I missed you, you know? But when I got to thinking why, I realized it wasn't because I loved you, like before. No, it was because I was so attuned to your presence that it was weird to not have you around. My heart didn't feel like it was bleeding without you, like it did before. And I'm sure you feel the same way, or you would've already tried to get in contact with me. So it'd be best for us to end things off before we ruin each other by trying to stick it out. I love you, but I'm not in love with you like I was before. So, don't try to convince me otherwise and I'll see you when you get back. Stay safe. Bye, Louis." And before Louis could protest, the call was ended.

_He's right,_ was Louis' first thought. _He has to be right or I'd be feeling the need to cry._ Somewhere along the nearing four years of living together, Louis and Chris had fallen out of love with one another. Maybe they had just been too codependent on one another to realize it, maybe they had been so accustomed to having the other near, that they'd both mistaken their feelings of comfort and stability to be them still being deeply in love with one another. Shaking off the sadness, Louis wiped his face, still a bit shocked at how cool they had ended things. Louis hoped they'd both be able to easily work with one another still. Slowly, after swiping off imaginary dust from his outfit, Louis headed back inside, a sense of being unburdened making Louis feel as if he was walking on air.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I've decided that this will end up being a four chapter short story. But I have to ask, would you guys like the next, and last, chapter to include some sexy time between Harry and Louis? Let me know your thoughts, as always it would be MUCH appreciated. See you guys next time! Toodles!

**Author's Note:**

> okay so this is obviously my first fic and it's not edited that well but yeah it'd mean a lot if you guys would read and maybe you could leave a positive comment :)


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